Accept, with adjusted terms
- What you expect to gain
- I can keep the relationship going and still contribute where it's needed.
- What you expect to take on
- I'd need to first adjust either my existing schedule or the scope of the new request.
Fictional example · Finished note
A Note for a Day of Choosing
A finished note built from a fictional situation — not a real person's record.
The situation you wrote
A teammate asked me to take on extra work. I already have a full plate, and I'm worried refusing will make things awkward.
What each option gains and costs
The following is what you wrote yourself as an expectation — not an actual outcome.
Decline this one
- What you expect to gain
- I can protect the deadline on what I'm already handling, and my own working hours.
- What you expect to take on
- I'd need to clearly explain why I'm declining and what I can actually take on right now.
Three things you want to protect either way
- I need to meet the deadline on my existing work.
- I need to know the scope and time required for the new request.
- I need to protect some rest time this week.
What matters most to you
I want to say clearly what I can do right now, without damaging the relationship.
What to confirm before deciding
- Your first condition "I need to meet the deadline on my existing work." Is this something you've already confirmed, or still just an expectation?
- What matters most to you "I want to say clearly what I can do right now, without damaging the relationship." To judge this, write down who you'd need to check with and what you'd need to ask.
When to revisit this choice
Revisit date: 2026-10-15 Check back in on that day. If your priority or any of the three conditions has changed, look at both options side by side again.
What to say, and what to do next
Here's what matters most to me in this decision. "I want to say clearly what I can do right now, without damaging the relationship." Here's my first condition. "I need to meet the deadline on my existing work." By when I need to know: 2026-10-15 Could you get back to me by then?
Revisit date: 2026-10-15 Decide who you'll check with and when, and once you hear back, look at both options again.
This note doesn't judge which option is right or predict the outcome — it's a personal file that organizes what you wrote into a clear order for checking things.